点评:As soon as I walked into Aura, I knew I had made a mistake. Someone was on the microphone shouting over a blasting sound system, trying to teach a crowd of mostly confused people—who couldn’t even pronounce bachata, let alone dance it—how to dance to Despacito. This bizarre tutorial lasted 30 minutes.
People around me kept saying, “It has to get better.”
It didn’t.
When the “music” finally started, it got worse. A DJ named Chilly took over and turned the vibe into a chaotic mashup of a middle school dance, a retirement home party, and a TikTok algorithm gone rogue. Imagine the worst sound effects you’ve ever heard—now imagine them layered over:
• Mans Not Hot
• Hotline Bling
• Gangnam Style
• Heaven Is a Place on Earth
• Crank That (Soulja Boy)
• Nokia (by Drake)
This was their actual setlist. I walked in at 10:50 PM and walked out by 11:56 PM. For context, I’m the kind of person who stays at a party until the lights come on and the sun comes up. If the party ends at 7 AM, I’m there till 7. So for me to dip before midnight? That says a lot.
And the drinks? Somehow worse than the music.
• $10 for a beer
• $20 for a Jack & Coke
• $20 for a single shot
None of them were even good. I’ve had better drinks at dive bars during happy hour.
Oh, and the name of the club? Aura—which is painfully ironic, because the only vibe this place had was pure secondhand embarrassment.
翻译:一走进Aura,我就知道自己犯了一个错误。有人拿着麦克风,对着震耳欲聋的音响系统大喊大叫,试图教一群大多一头雾水的人——他们甚至连bachata的发音都念不出来,更别说跳了——怎么跟着Despacito跳。这套怪异的教程持续了30分钟。
我周围的人不停地说:“必须改进。”
结果却事与愿违。
当“音乐”终于响起时,情况却变得更糟了。一位名叫Chilly的DJ接手,把现场气氛变成了中学舞会、养老院派对和失控的TikTok算法的混搭。想象一下你听过的最烂的音效——现在想象一下它们叠加在一起:
• Mans Not Hot
• Hotline Bling
• Gangnam Style
• Heaven Is a Place on Earth
• Crank That (Soulja Boy)
• Nokia (Drake演唱)
这是他们真正的歌单。我晚上10:50进去,11:56出来。说白了,我是那种会在派对上待到灯亮太阳升起的人。如果派对早上7点结束,我就会待到7点。所以说,我午夜前就得喝完?这说明了很多问题。
还有酒水?比音乐还糟糕。
• 啤酒10美元
• 杰克可乐20美元
• 一小杯20美元
这些酒水都不好喝。我以前在廉价酒吧的欢乐时光喝过比它们更好的酒。
哦,还有这家俱乐部的名字?Aura——这名字讽刺得让人心酸,因为这家酒吧唯一的感觉就是纯粹的尴尬。